Balance between being consistent, and over-asking the dog

  • Balance between being consistent, and over-asking the dog

    Posted by Charlotte on February 26, 2021 at 2:53 AM

    This is something I sometimes struggle with. Fred is now over 11 moths old, and I think he’s well into his puberty.

    He listens anywhere between pretty well and very well, one moment better than another. That’s all fine, I know things are not easy for him with all the hormones now, as long as he doesn’t listen badly.

    But sometimes, there are these moment when he’s really driving me up the walls, when I’m asking a simple thing like “lay down”, and he Just. Won’t. Do. It. And I think that, at that time, the thing I’m asking him is só far removed from the thing he actually wants to do, that it’s therefore very difficult for him to obey.

    The question here is, what to do with this behaviour. I see two possible ways to handle it.

    1. I’ll continue demanding the commanded position, correct him, and finally sometimes manually force him into the asked position. This seems like an option that might be good, because I win. But at the same time, I think I might be crushing him with this approach. Putting too much pressure on him. But if I don’t do it, then he wins?

    2. I’ll ask him several times, and when he won’t budge, I’ll ask him something else, so at least he is still obeying me. Maybe what I ask him is too difficult at that moment. Upside: he is obeying something, even when it’s not what I was initially asking him. Downside: He succeeded in not obeying the initial command. Will he now think he can get away with this more often?

    This is a thing I’m really struggling with. Both options seem right and wrong. What would you do?

    Short example of one of these situations; I’m working at home, and he is asking for attention. He’s not allowed to do that, so I send him to his dogbed. Sending him to the dogbed means “go there and lie down”. But sometimes when he is in that mood, he will barely go over there, and when he does, he will NOT lie down.

    Charlotte replied 2 years, 11 months ago 3 Members · 5 Replies
  • 5 Replies
  • Logan C.

    Member
    March 8, 2021 at 9:08 PM

    Hey Char,

    You need to be clear with your expectations. If he knows he’s supposed to lie down, then he needs to lie down. At this stage of his life he’s trying to figure what he can and can’t get away with, so you need to make it clear to him. If you ask him to do something, he MUST do it. With that being said, if you’re in a circumstance where you don’t think he will listen to you, then don’t ask him to do anything unless absolutely necessary.

    My dog absolutely nails his obedience and listens well everywhere except for the vet’s office. I know this, so I drastically lower my criteria and ask very little of him. If I ask him to do something, I make sure that he does it but I only ask of something if I need to. I usually take it easy on him though because I don’t believe it’s fair to over force him to do things.

    • Charlotte

      Member
      March 17, 2021 at 7:18 AM

      Thanks for your reply Logan, this lines up with what I think is the right way to handle this, good to see that you confirm my thoughts.

  • Riggan

    Moderator
    March 11, 2021 at 8:59 AM

    Char, I am going to answer your question indirectly. It is all related to fairness. Dogs can handle correction very well without it “crushing” them as long as it is delivered at a level appropriate to their temperament and with fairness and consistency. Some dogs are very soft (like my current dog), and a simple “No” is a very strong correction. Other dogs are harder and need a much firmer correction or tool such as a prong or e-collar. So first assess your dog’s temperament and how he responds when you correct him. If he ignores you or blows you off, your correction was not firm enough. If he cringes, cowers, or shuts down, you were way too firm and need to lighten up (or you are putting him in a position where you have to correct him way too much).

    Next is the issue of fairness. It is not fair to correct a dog when he does not understand what you want him to do. Many people overestimate how well their dog understands basic obedience commands (sit, down, stay, come, etc). They think the dog “knows” the command when he is actually responding to physical or contextual cues. You can see how well the dog truly understands by trying some of the following (we’ll use “Sit” as an example). Does he sit when you:

    • Tell him Sit with your back to him?
    • Whisper the word Sit?
    • Tell him Sit when you are standing behind him or in something other than the usual position you are in when training him?
    • Tell him Sit when you are sitting on the sofa?
    • Tell him Sit when you are in different rooms, in the garage, in the yard, at the park?
    • Tell him Sit when you are laying on the floor?

    If not, then he doesn’t really know what the word “Sit” means and you need to keep working on it. If he can’t do all these things in a calm environment, then it is not fair to expect him to respond when there are all kinds of excitement and distraction. If he truly does know what the command means in the context that your are using it, then it is quite possible that he is either testing you or simply doesn’t respect you enough to obey (which is quite possible with an 11 month old dog!). In this case, you MUST carry through with a correction and demand that he listen to you. How you do this goes back to your dog’s temperament, but in general I would not force him into a position. Your correction should be such that he complies, not that you have forced him.

    If you find this happening frequently, then you need to consider that you may be moving too quickly. Training for distractions is done step by step, always with the idea of setting the dog up for success. Just because he knows “Sit” at home doesn’t mean he is ready to sit at a busy park with lots of other dogs, people throwing Frisbees, children screaming in the playground, etc. Find someplace much quieter where you can train and reward with abundant praise, treats, play, or whatever else is enjoyable for the dog. In general, I try to have at least 80-90% of my interactions with the dog positive, with only 10-20% corrections. If I need too many corrections, it means I am doing something wrong and need to reevaluate my training plan.

    • Charlotte

      Member
      March 17, 2021 at 7:30 AM

      Riggan, your answer is very extended and very helpful. The way you describe for confirming whether a dog knows a command or not is very nice, and i’ll definitely be using this from now on to check how far I am with teaching a behaviour.

      I am quite positive that the simple commands I’m asking him at these moments when he ignores my command, are things he really does know, and he’s just testing me. He just knows that when I don’t have a leash on him (so at home, when we’re not training) that I cannot reinforce the corrections as well as when I do have the leash. But he needs to listen without a leash too, especially when we’re simply being at home.

      I think I probably need to train him more often in these situations (just simple short training sessions so he gets to understand that he should listen in the house as well), and maybe I might want to back myself up with an e-collar here… That would show him that without a leash, I am still in charge. But yes, you are 100% right, rewarding him for actions should be happening much much more often than correcting him.

      Thanks for thinking with me.

  • Charlotte

    Member
    April 20, 2021 at 9:22 AM

    Hi all, thought it was time for an update.

    Going on the advice given by other members, I have decided to patiently work on the commands in the house, rewarding very often, instead of trying to enforce commands which Fred maybe didn’t yet fully understand.

    Strange enough, the ignoring of commands has hardly happened anymore for some time already. I’m thinking maybe this may be related to the dog’s trust in me increasing. Early on, I sometimes lost my patience and forced him to do stuff, or even in a worst case I showed him the back of my hand. I stopped doing that though, and I feel that that has perhaps been the biggest contributing factor. I feel so bad for having done that to him!

    I have bought an Ecollar, and I’m overly excited that I now don’t have any aversive issues to use it with, and instead I can start just using it in myiy everyday training!

    Thanks so much for your support, Logan and Riggan.

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