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5 month old DS acts jealous around child
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5 month old DS acts jealous around child
Hello,
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</div><div>This is my first time posting here. I’ve been watching Robert’s videos for a little over half a year now and been a member for a few months to show my appreciation of the things I’ve learned from him. I always had dogs growing up (beagles, inside floof dogs, a Collie/GSD mix, full blooded GSD). The big dogs were outside dogs and we never had any issues.</div><div>
</div><div>Heres the situation I’m in now. We got a Malinios/Dutch Shepherd mix a few months ago. Her name is Riley. She’ll be 5 months old next week. She’s the only pet we have. She lives with me, my wife, our 4 year old daughter, and 2 year old son. My wife doesn’t work so she has pretty much constant companionship.</div><div>
</div><div>A few months ago she was good aggressive and snipped at my son once. He tripped and landed on here, so she wasn’t being full on aggressive. I corrected her, he learned a lesson, and we haven’t had any issue since on that front.</div>Riley is the most attached to me. I can’t go anywhere or do anything without her wanting to be there at least within sight of me when I’m home. Apparently she’s a different dog when I’m home compared to just with my wife. She’s more playful, active, and vocal. We get down and play together in the floor and yard a lot. I’m the only one who plays “rough” with her.
Normally she loves the rest of my immediate family as well. When my boy plays with her she slows down and plays easy because she knows she’s stronger. She gets the “zoomies” when he gets up in the morning she’s so excited to see him. He’ll go up to her and give her hugs and she loves to give him kisses.
Now to the situation that made me not sleep all night. Last night a little before bedtime I’m laying on the couch, my 4 year old beside me, Riley above my head. My boy comes over to kiss me on top of the head and she nips him in the nose. Nothing more. No aggression from him. It stopped immediately, it wasn’t an attack. It was completely uncalled for. My boy wasn’t being aggressive.
Riley is very protective over our family and usually a great dog. This is out of character for her. Where do I go from here to assure it doesn’t happen again? I don’t want to give her away because she’s part of the family.
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6 Replies
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Chances are he just wanted to interact and did not know what else to do. You would have to see it to be sure. I would just keep an eye on it for now.
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My puppy does it to me on occasion when he is supper exited. And he definitely does not see me as a playmate. Robert’s advice is not to put your face where the puppy can reach… cuz that is what they do.
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Speaking of what I just played with my puppy and he nipped my right ear, my left year, my left cheek and my nose… all in less than a minute. Lol
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William,
I don’t think you are anywhere near a level of needing to rehome the dog. You have a 5 month old puppy who is just entering adolescence and two young children that the dog will identify as “litter mates.” This is a time period that calls for lots of structure. Height equals status, and Riley was simply communicating to your son that she is higher status in the pack than he is. This is where you need to develop a strategy that works for you and your family so Riley can grow up confident of her position in the “pack”. Here are a few things I would consider:
1) At this age, I would be using the crate a lot. In one of the recent videos (I can’t remember which one), Robert was saying that most dogs need to spend significant time in the crate until they are a year old, but that for malinois, it is usually more like 2 years. Put the crate where Riley can still feel like part of the family, but she does not get to dictate family interactions. I would particularly have her in the crate when you are playing with the kids. She will learn that this is just a time for her to chill out. If he gets too excited, move the crate further away until she learns to be calm.
2) At this point, I would not allow Riley on the furniture at all (which is where I assume she was when you say she was over your hear). It gives her too much status. I am not against dogs on furniture, but she just showed you that having that privilege is going to her head, so privilege is lost.
3) Continue to work with Riley on obedience so you develop a strong Sit and Down stay. You might also want to get a cot bed or some other dog bed to teach her a “place” command. Then, she is not allowed off the “place” until released.
Remember that she is very young and keep on giving her the structure she needs. She is just entering her “teenage” period where she will start testing everything. Don’t be surprised and just be calm, consistent and fair. She will emerge through this as a lovely dog.
Regarding her attachment to you, my husband and I have the same situation in reverse. Our GSD mix loves us both and prefers having us all 3 together, but when I leave, he gets mopey. You might want to get your wife more involved in the training, although that might be a challenge since she also has a 2- and 4-year-old to take care of! As long as the dog has a good relationship with all of you, though, I wouldn’t worry about it too much.
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I want you to understand that I am not a trainer. My experience might or might not apply to your dog, but I think it does. We received a female dog from a friend that soon after had 6 pups. One of the pups when it was around 6 to 9 Mo old, I cant remember for sure, it suddenly decided to be extremely attached to me. If I wasn’t home he was friendly with my husband but as soon as I came home he would lean away from him and look for me. With the slightest encouragement from me he would fight to get to me. Being a small dog we thought he would hurt himself jumping in a half hazard way out of my husbands arms. Needless to say, I discouraged the dog from attempting to get away from my husband.
One evening the dog was sleeping in my lap and my husband leaned over to me, coming close to the dog as well. My dog woke up and bit at him, just barely missing him. Now my husband was incline to believe that he startled the dog but that is not the case. I immediately reprimanded the dog as if it had attempted to bite me. During the weeks just before this event he also started to growl under his breath at neighborhood children, and from one day to the next occasion he lunged at one of them.
I watched a dog training video of another trainer ( about 12 years ago). He went into the home of a family where their dog was doing a similar thing. The trainer said that the one the dog “loved” had to take a stand and refuse to allow the dog to act that way. Absolutely refuse to accept the behavior. It would only escalate until someone was seriously injured if action was not taken.
I applied the same technique, As If My Dog tried to bite Me, to all occasions of grumbling, snapping, or lunging at anyone. It worked on him. I emphatically said (Don’t you dare bite me!) Believe me. I put feeling into the words. As if he attempted to attack me! A spoken growl that left no doubt that any attempt to bite at anyone was the same as the unpardonable offence of biting me.
My dog did not doubt that I considered his action as doing precisely that. Anyone that I accept in my presence is to be accepted and my dog could not make the decision for me.
As long as Riley wants your approval he should be able to learn that all those in your household are an extension of you, despite their size, if you take a stand and absolutely demand it. Unless the dog is brane damaged or severely abuses or some such extreme circumstance.
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I just wanted to clarify that my other post was not about dogs getting excited in play and nipping while over excited, but where the dog clams you as theirs and they choose who gets to be near you or behaving as if they only need one human in their lives and all others beware.
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